Uwe Boll Says He's Done Destroying Video Games

It's done. It's finally over. In a recent interview, Uwe Boll claimed that he has no intentions of making another video game film adaptation. No longer will we watch an IP's film prospects crumble into dust at his hands. He claims that he can no longer afford to make these films because of how much critics hate his films. The only thing off about his claim is that he must have accidentally said the word "critics" instead of "everyone." Everyone hates his films.


Alternately, this clip is both relevant and from a fantastic film.

As a kid, I was a fan of the arcade series, The House of the Dead. The gameplay was fun, the zombies were cool, and I always had a blast dual-wielding those light guns. So I was absolutely thrilled when I saw it was being adapted for the silver screen. "Finally, popular video games are getting the love they deserve!" I told myself. My dad let us rent a copy of it, and my excitement knew no bounds. Tragically, far too many of you already know how this story ends.


No, wait! Don't look at it! Save yourself!

That was my first real exposure to the work of Uwe Boll. For the lucky few of you who don't know this tragedy, Boll is a man who is infamous for making absolutely horrible films. I'm talking garbage. The worst of the worst. Just indescribable horrors. And, in the most twisted joke reality has ever played, he was also the director who insisted on making film adaptations of video games. His portfolio includes games like Postal, Bloodrayne, Alone in the Dark, Far Cry, and more. And yes, every single one of those are crimes against film, storytelling, and literally everything else.

That is why, with full sincerity, I say, good riddance to the worst thing that's ever happened to video games during my lifetime.