Metal Gear Survive Release Date Announced

Hey, who here remembers that Metal Gear Survive is a thing? If you're anything like the majority of Metal Gear Fans, you've been working very hard to forget, but sadly, ignorance won't make this future train wreck go away. In fact, the date of its launch has just been made official, and it's going to be inflicted upon the world far sooner than we may have first thought.

Revealed via Tweet (which also details some pre-order bonuses you can receive because of course it did), Metal Gear Survive is slated to launch on PC, Xbox One, and PS4 on February 20th for the US, and the 22nd on Europe.

The excitement is palpable, I'm sure.

But how about those pre-order bonuses I was going on about? Well, if you decide you want to be first in line to see the Metal Gear story crucified by Konami, then you'll get four gold-plated melee weapons (a bat, a spear, a machete, and a sledgehammer), two unique gestures for multiplayer play (happy and enthusiasm), four metallic survival scarves, whatever that is, Kabuki face paint for extra customization, a boxman accessory that turns your face into a cardboard box, and a mother base name plate.

Look, I know it's not really proper of me to insult a game this much before its released, but if we can ruthlessly mock Bubsy for its decision to come back from the grave, I don't see why this game should get a pass.

Anyway. That's the news.