Introducing Keven Hart as Roland in the Borderland's Movie

The Borderlands movie is still rolling along, presumably. The last we heard about this almost certainly bad movie, they had managed to cast nerd heroine Cate Blanchett as Lilith, who could be doing anything better with her time but decided to spend it on this train wreck for some reason.

And if my glumness towards the project seems premature, by all means, consider the following news: it was just announced that actor and alleged comedian Keven Hart has just been cast as Roland.

It's an appropriate casting choice in one respect: Roland was always the least funny member of the original game's cast, given his stoic and serious demeanor, so it makes sense they would give the role to someone as unfunny as Keven Hart. In every other respect, it's an odd choice, given how Keven Hart definitely doesn't look like a soldier... or anyone who's ever been asked to carry more than a five-pound bag.

But at least one person is excited for this development -- director Eli Roth, who had this to say to the Hollywood Reporter:
 

“I’m thrilled to be working with Kevin. Borderlands is a different kind of role for him, and we are excited to thrill audiences with a side of Kevin they’ve never seen before. He’s going to be an amazing Roland.”

We're still a long ways from seeing -- or in my case, going out of my way to not see -- the Borderlands movie in question. While it's not quite as ambiguous as the Halo or Tetris movie hypothetically in the works, it's still absolutely in its earliest stages, and it'll be a few years, at least, before the world gets to see friggen Kevin Hart as Roland.

I dunno, maybe a really good trailer could change my mind, but right now, the idea of a Borderlands that's all dialogue and no gameplay with Keven Hart just makes me depressed.