"Escape from the City" May be our New National Anthem

I suggest to President Barrack Obama that we change the national anthem to Ted Poley and Tony Harnell's more upbeat and less controversial "Escape from the City" as featured in the smash-hit video game Sonic Adventure 2.

These are the words written by visionary super-patriot Gabe Carley, who recently started a petition on Change.org with a very simple goal: spurred by the recent protests by NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick, he wants to replace our current, controversial and war-mongering national anthem from The Star Spangled Banner (written by a racist, who makes that very clear by the 3rd verse) with Escape from the City, the main theme of Sonic Adventure 2's first level, appropriately named City Escape.

Tell us, America, would you rather be reminded of the constant violence and threats faced by the soldiers of 1812 to get to this still-divided point in U.S. history or be set free by the rush of danger lurking around every turn as you follow your rainbow at the speed of sound?

Already, the petition is gaining traction. Despite only being a day old, at the time of this writing, it's already garnished 11,870 signatures, only 3100 signatures short from reaching the first milestone. People are going to Youtube and Reddit to spread the word, and they've already even got t-shirts on sale.

So I call upon you, GamerzUnite, to band together with Gabe Carley and demand action. We might not be able to fix racism in our lifetime, but we can't stick around, we've got to keep moving on: because what lies ahead, there's only one way to find out.